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Fun: UFO/Alien translations Thread poster: Halil Ibrahim Tutuncuoglu "Бёcäטsع Լîfe's cômplicåtعd eñøugh"
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The United Nations is set to appoint Mazlan Othman as space ambassador for extraterrestrial contact affairs. THE PROBLEM IS WHO WILL MAKE THE TRANSLATIONS?
How do you think the rates/hour and means of payment should be?
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Why not ... per light year? (;
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Jack Doughty 
United Kingdom
Local time: 01:09
Russian to English
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In memoriam | I think they'll have to use alien translators | Oct 5, 2010 |
The aliens will have to be much more advanced than we are to have got here over so many light years (a light year, by the way, is a measure of distance, not time - quite a considerable distance, since light travels at 186,000 miles per second), and their own intelligence and that of their computers, robots, androids etc. will be of a vastly higher order than ours.
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| What worries me most is... | Oct 6, 2010 |
...what is the actual rate gap between human translators and alien translators? If they are paid more I am OK with that, since that will in due time raise our rates. But... are they paid less than humans? That will probably lead human agencies to hire them for human translation at a ridiculous cost, despite the poor quality.
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| What about ... | Oct 6, 2010 |
... the travelling expenses?
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David Wright
Austria
Local time: 02:09
German to English
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| Will be worse | Oct 6, 2010 |
just imagine - telecom call centres on Betelgeuse!
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| Withdrawing money from a bank account | Oct 6, 2010 |
"Sorry, Sir, we can't give you any cash from that account. The planet was blown up last week."
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Simone Linke
Germany
Local time: 02:09
Member (2009)
English to German
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No need for translations.. they'll bring some babelfish with them. Don't you know anything about aliens?!
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| Are you suggesting... | Oct 6, 2010 |
Simone Linke wrote: No need for translations.. they'll bring some babelfish with them. Don't you know anything about aliens?!
...they will laugh aloud about human automatic translation systems? How they dare! They are so good!
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| But what about tax law? | Oct 6, 2010 |
Simone Linke wrote: No need for translations.. they'll bring some babelfish with them. Don't you know anything about aliens?!
Even human tax consultants often don't understand tax law, let alone tax law in different languages, in different countries or on different planets. What chance has Babelfish got?
Or will tax law be simplified to the point of "pay up or get blown up"?
As Douglas Adams suggested, Babelfish did not bring peace, it in fact caused more bloodshed than ever before.
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Alison Sabedoria (X)
United Kingdom
French to English
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I agree with Simone, so astute translators might want to diversify into babelfish farming pretty soon.
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| no travelling expenses | Oct 6, 2010 |
Victor Dewsbery wrote: ... the travelling expenses?
they use free and environmentally friendly solar energy
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Alison Sabedoria (X)
United Kingdom
French to English
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The way things are going, we won't need to wait for aliens before the "pay up or get blown up" system becomes the norm here, though I can't really see myself adding that to the bottom of my bills.
And, as you suggest, the babelfish won't really help. At least when two people don't understand each other, there's room for giving the other the benefit of the doubt, or for an interpreter to "tweak" the level of insult.
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| My time ain't free | Oct 6, 2010 |
İbrahim Tutuncuoglu wrote: Victor Dewsbery wrote: ... the travelling expenses? they use free and environmentally friendly solar energy
But they've still gotta pay for my time.
After all, if I'm out of the loop for my regular clients for a light year or two, someone's gotta compensate me.
$$$$$ €€€€€
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Jack Doughty
United Kingdom
Local time: 01:09
Russian to English
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In memoriam | The tax authorities will find them | Oct 6, 2010 |
Rimmer, one of the crew of "Red Dwarf" (UK TV series), was landed with a tax bill from the Outland Revenue (as opposed to the Inland Revenue) for two million pounds because the spaceship had been in a state of suspended animation for hundreds of years. Doubtless the US External Revenue Service and the Betelgeuse tax authorities would do the same.
[Edited at 2010-10-06 09:09 GMT]
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